A client told me my proposals were 'too salesy' and it stung but they were right

I had this one client in Dallas who flat out said my proposals sounded like a used car salesman wrote them lol. She said she wanted to see the problem and the solution, not a bunch of fluff about our 'proprietary process'. So I stripped out all the buzzwords and just led with their specific pain points and how we'd fix them. Has anyone else had to totally rework how they pitch after getting feedback like that?

2 comments

2 Comments

eric35914d ago

Yeah turning it into a normal conversation made all the difference for me too.

matthew_morgan15d ago

Three years ago I had a guy in Austin tell me my proposals read like I was trying to sell him a timeshare. I cut all the corporate speak and started writing them like I was explaining it to a buddy over lunch. Your mileage may vary but now I get way fewer pushbacks on the actual approach because people see the roadmap instead of the marketing fluff.